


Dan and Tyler Being Offensive

by DestielPhanCaleo_Shipper



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Mild Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 14:09:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5589073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DestielPhanCaleo_Shipper/pseuds/DestielPhanCaleo_Shipper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It is necessary for you to have seen the video in which this fic is based on for you to understand what is happening (called Dan and Tyler Being Offensive on danisnotonfire's channel, obviously). If you already have-great! Just continue reading! But if you haven't please do so and then you can enjoy my fanfic (I would've put a link but it doesn't seem to be working, sorry). Thank you so much, now I'll go away to let you read.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dan and Tyler Being Offensive

**Author's Note:**

> This Phanfic was published on my Wattpad account (Caleo_Shipper) and I just wanted to add it to AO3 as well.

**_Dan's POV:_ **

"During sex, I like to think about..." I read the card aloud, my face starting to heat up as I think of the last person that I had sex with was most likely able to hear what I was saying as he was in the room right beside mine. I quickly try to compose my face, which in the end, makes me look kind of mad and kind of annoyed.

"Rude question," I mutter, placing the card down to look through my deck.

Tyler hums in agreement as he searches through his.

I have "the 'shy kid in the corner'," "the fear of erect penises," "'Flo' from the Progressive commercials," "throwing a virgin into a volcano," and I'm about to keep looking when that last one catches my eye. 

Chuckling, I place it in the back of the pile so I can place the cards face-down on my lap and pick the card I wanted to when it was my turn to read it aloud.

"Okay," Tyler looks up at me uncertainly. "I think I maybe have it."

Tyler looks at the camera. 

"Okay, I'm gonna go with," Tyler chooses one card and holds it up, "Morgan Freeman's Voice." He makes it sound as if it were a question.

"I mean,  _ kinda _ -think about it." Tyler glances at me.

"Oh," I laugh, "I think we all do." I say.

"Yeah-" Tyler starts but then a siren sounds from down the street and Tyler is instantly annoyed.

I laugh again, "Get pretty turned on by Morgan Freeman's voice." I say, having been used to all the sirens so it takes me a few seconds to register that Tyler isn't used to it. Tyler laughs at my remark, glancing at the window.

"I hate your street," Tyler laughs slightly.

"Can you not?" I agree sarcastically.

"Okay, you're turn." Tyler turns his whole body to face me.

I glance at my card before looking up at him.

"Well, someone's excited to know what I think about as I have sex." I smirk.

Tyler laughs, not at all fazed by this.

"Okay, when I'm having sex, I like to think about," I pause slightly, a grin tugging on my lips.

**_Phil's POV:_ **

I can hear every word Dan and Tyler are saying and it's pretty funny.

"During sex I like to think about," Dan pauses ever so slightly to add suspense. "Throwing a virgin into a volcano." 

Tyler laughs breathlessly.

"You can have that one," Tyler says as Dan says, "Is this the first time-is this the first time-ah, haha!"

Tyler laughs louder.

"Then just kinda, do your business over the um..."

"Over the cliff." Tyler finishes his sentence, Dan seemingly forgotten what it was called.

"That's your point." Tyler says. 

"Yes!" Dan says happily.

"So what do you really think about while you're with Phil in his be-"

"Tyler!" Dan yells.

Tyler erupts in a fit of laughter and I feel my face heating up.

"You-" Tyler laughs even louder. "You-you th-think of-of m-m-e while you're f-fuckin-"

"No!" Dan yells, which causes Tyler to laugh even louder and you can hear him hiccuping for breath through the wall.

**_Dan's POV:_ **

My face heats up partially from embarrassment because Phil is sure to hear this in the room next door and partially from laughter as I gasp in lungfuls of breath occasionally when I have a chance.

"Okay, that's getting cut out." I mutter once we have calmed down.

"No." Tyler whines.

"Too bad, we're doing this again, and don't say stuff I'll have to cut out because we will keep doing this."

Tyler groans. "Why?"

"Tyler, hun, I dunno if you've noticed but we aren't really going to open up to the internet through dirty questions like that."

Tyler laughs again.

"Okay," Tyler agrees reluctantly, "again."

I nod.

"You can have that." Tyler says. "That's your point."

"Oh," I raise my arms slightly, "thank you."

**_*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*_ **

**_*-*    Time skip to after the filming of the video  *-*_ **

**_*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*_ **

**_(Still Dan's POV if you're curious.)_ **

I turn off the camera and turn around to face Tyler, leaning against the desk.

"So, what'd you think of our first collab?" I ask.

"Collab," Tyler mimics me, wrinkling his nose slightly as he smiles. "Well, I thought the  _ collab, _ " he says, emphasizing how he says it in his American accent, "was awesome and that we should do more."

"Minus the dirty jokes and whatnot."

"No, I say we can add some more, and maybe we can get Phil to join us-"

"No, it's bad enough when you're using your jokes on me, Phil won't react to it as I do."

"Will he get upset?" Tyler has never seen Phil upset, the most being the slight pout he gets when he's sad but never anymore that that.

"No, just... I dunno!" I raise my hands in exasperation. "He'll be really embarrassed! I dunno!"

Tyler laughs, "And you weren't?"

"Not as bad as Phil tends to get," I say taking a breath and leaning off the desk.

"Wait, Dan-"

Tyler puts his hand on my arm, seeing as he can't  _ comfortably _ reach my shoulder so he has to resort to my arm, to stop me as I walk towards the door.

"I'm just curious but-"

"Hey, how was it?" Phil asks, entering the room in his pajamas which he did not want to change out of from this morning. It is now 3 o'clock pm.

Tyler takes his hand off my arm and turns to a slightly confused and wary looking Phil.

"It was hilarious, did you hear it?"

"Was hard not to," Phil smiles, uncertainty hiding behind his eyes.

I laugh nervously, "Okay, let's go Tyler, enough with the interrogation. Out ya go." I lightly push him towards the door with both hands and he immediately understands that I'm trying to talk to Phil,  _ in private. _

Once out the door, Tyler closes it behind him.

"Hey," I sigh.

"Hello," Phil smiles brightly.

I chuckle, holding my arms out to him. Smiling still, Phil steps into my arms and I wrap them around him. Phil puts his head on my shoulder.

"What did you think about it?"

"A lot of personal questions," Phil mutters, shifting slightly.

I chuckle slightly, "Yeah, luckily you didn't have them directed at you."

Phil looks up and stares at me, the grin never really having left his mouth.

I lean down and kiss him softly, not anything deep or passionate, just a feather-light kiss. I pull back and rest my forehead on his.

"C'mon, Tyler ought to be getting bored out there all alone." I say, Phil wrinkles his nose, his grin widening.

I am too caught up in his multi-colored, mostly blue, eyes to notice the quick and soft running of feet from out in the hall.

I grab Phil's hand and walk towards the door.

Just as I'm about to open it Phil tugs on my hand, his way of making me turn to face him without saying anything.

I turn around, confused as to why he'd stop me, when I'm met with a soft pair of lips pressed against mine.

Shock runs through me for a second before I wrap my arms around his waist on reflex.

I'm about to pull back when Phil tangles his hands in my hair, the obvious sign that he isn't going to let go anytime soon.

Internally groaning, why does Phil have to be in the mood  _ now, _ I pull on Phil's sleeves, the thing that I do when I want Phil to stop.

Phil pretty much growls and pushes me against the door with an audible bang.

I gasp for air and from surprise. 

Phil deepens the kiss even more and even though I want him to stop I can't find it in myself to resist.

Phil presses his hips further into me and I can't help but moan. I cut it short as the thought of Tyler waiting outside there somewhere can most likely hear me.

With a great amount of effort, I flip us so Phil's against the wall. I look up so he can't reach my lips but it's a mistake because he just starts to suck on my neck.

"G-god d-damn it Ph-Phil. S-stop."

Phil makes a "no," sound as he continues to nip at my neck, licking it after leaving a slight mark.

I finally am able to pull back and keep my hands pressed on his shoulders to keep him against the door.

"Phil," I breath in deeply. "What was that for?" I ask incredulously.

Phil half glares-half stares at me with lust in his eyes.

"Phil, please calm down, Tyler is literally out there," I nod to the door, "and he's leaving today so I'm going to bid him goodbye, you can come if you want."

Phil's expression never changes.

Groaning slightly I let him go and Phil steps to the side, letting me open the door and go through out into the hall. I don't hear his footsteps follow me.

Sighing, I run my hand through my hair, hoping Phil didn't ruin it so badly, as I walk down the stairs and into the kitchen where Tyler is sitting at the breakfast table facing me. The smirk greatly pronounced on his face.

My face turns red immediately and that causes Tyler to laugh. He gets up and walks towards me, arms open wide.

I wrap my arms around his waist, flinching slightly as I think of Phil, and he wraps his arms around my shoulders, being too short to reach my neck.

I pull back a few seconds later and drop my arms but Tyler keeps his placed on my arms.

"What was that for?" Tyler asks, nodding towards the stairs that lead to my room.

"I dunno," I sigh.

"Hmm....." Tyler looks as though he were thinking. "Maybe he is," Tyler glances around and leans forward, "jealous." He whispers.

"What why?" I ask aloud and in that moment Phil enters the room, his eyes immediately falling on Tyler and I, Tyler removes his hands, smirking again.

Oh,  _ that's _ why. _ Shit. _

"Well Dan and Phil," Tyler smirks some more, "it was awesome for you to have me here. I'd love to come back if you would. My planes leaving in a few hours and I want to catch up with some friends, so I'm sorry but I have to go."

I nod. "You're welcome here anytime Tyler," I glance at Phil who says nothing.

"Can I have a hug?" Tyler asks.

"Of course," I say, grimacing internally as I think of how Tyler knows what he's doing and how it'll affect Phil.

I hold my arms out to Tyler this time and he hugs me as he did before, his arms around my shoulders and mine around his waist.

Again, I drop my arms and lean back but Tyler keeps his arms on me.

Without changing my expression that much, I glare at Tyler. He just smirks before stepping back and holding his arms out to Phil who stiffly returns the hug, Tyler doesn't linger on Phil and I'm  _ this _ close to murdering him.

I walk Tyler to the door and open it for him, gesturing for him to leave. As he passes be me, my friendly smile flickers to an accusing glare and he just laughs slightly.

"Bye bitches!" Tyler makes a peace sign and holds it above his head as he walks down the hall.

I close the door when I hear his footsteps going down the stairs and can't bring myself to turn around as I can feel Phil staring at me.

Sighing I turn around and Phil locks eyes with me and I almost squirm under his gaze.

"What was that for Phil?" I ask softly.

"He was hitting on you." Phil pouts slightly, his whole demeanor changing from almost-hostile to normal-pouty-Phil.

"No he wasn't Phil," I sigh, rubbing my forehead.

"Yes he was!"

"No, he wasn't he said you looked like you were jealous when you came into the room and saw his hand on my arm and wanted to see what you would do when he kept messing with you like that."

Phil looks uncertain, slightly upset and confused all at once.

"I wasn't-"

"Yes, you were," I step forward. "Phil, _ I _ even noticed." I step even closer, closing the gap between us.

Phil looks at the ground and I smile, already knowing I won.

I slide my hands onto his waist. Phil slowly looks up, his eyes traveling over me for a few seconds before he looks into my eyes.

"Phil, it's okay." I whisper.

Phil hugs me tightly, smiling, I wrap my arms around him. Phil rests his head on my shoulder, making a sound of complaint, being upset and a childish feeling of unreason in the back of his throat.

"I love you so much when you're like this." 

Phil doesn't respond but I can tell his mood is improving.

"And I love how protective you are of me and how you were back in the room."

Phil hides further into my neck and I almost jump at the feeling of his breath against my neck. He makes a sound of complaint which proves that I'm just embarrassing him.

"C'mon," I mutter, grabbing his hand and leading him up the stairs and into my room.

Grinning I shut the door behind me and Phil is looking down, his face red.

I pull him towards me.

"Phil," I whisper into his ear softly, wrapping my arms around him again.

Phil just sets his hands on my chest and looks off to the side, his face still the same shade of red.

I immediately press my lips to his neck, sucking and biting at his skin.

Phil groans under me, squirming slightly.

"C'mon Phil," I mutter against his neck.

That seems to do it because Phil forcefully pushes me back against the wall, pressing himself against me before I can react and roughly kissing me.

Phil growls yet again in the back of his throat and he can tell I'm not going to stop him this time.

  
  
  
  



End file.
